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Ohgiri (Drama)

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Ohgiri (大喜利) is an audio drama and Track 10 on the second album of the FLCL soundtrack. In Japan, Ohgiri is a TV show about humorous storytelling. Haruko plays the role of the host, while Naota, Mamimi, Amarao and Kamon are the players.

English TranslationEdit

(Drums, applause from the audience in the hall)

Haruko: Ok...so that takes us to an Ohgiri performed by the Fooly Cooly Members. I'm Haruko, who's closest to Enraku Shishou (Teacher Enraku) in character, and I will be leading the procedure. I wonder which part of my character I'm talking about... anyway... let's start out with the introductions by subtly changing the characters.
Naota: Hey. I'm Naota. I want to fight someone strong. When I meet up with someone strong, I get all excited. There's nothing incredible going on. Only predictable things happen. If that's the case, I want to make something incredible happen.

(Audience laughter )

Haruko: Let's hear it for Takkun! Takkun, I hope you didn't self-destruct by doing something you're not used to. Ok, next!
Mamimi: Here's Mamimi.

(Audience laughter)

Haruko:
Is that it? That was a really simple intro. Oh well. Next!
Amarao: I'm Amarao. [Amarao de gozaimasu]
Haruko: Huh? What the heck is that?
Amarao: I'm Amarao. [Amarao de gozaimasu] I'm trying to sound like "Sazae-san."
Haruko: You need to raise up the end of the phrase, otherwise you just sound like a polite person. Ok...the last one.
Kamon: This is Kamon. [Kamon de gozaimasu]

(Audience laughter)

Haruko: You made the same joke! I fell off my chair, dude. Which is all pretty fun. Ok! Let's get started. Miyu Miyu will be bringing all of you your zabutons.*
(* Note: A zabuton is a traditional sitting mat / floor cushion)
Miyu Miyu: Po pe po pen!
Haruko: Oh...ok ok. Here's our first topic. As if I'm reading. Ok...today I want you all to come up with the never-before-heard Fooly Cooly story number 7. Ok, then, starting with Takkun...
Naota: Summer vacation...as always, we go off to our seaside school...
Haruko: Hmmm...that's not really realistic...
Naota: Oops! They'll find out. Keep your voice down. Don't push...we'll get into trouble. Oh no!
A girl: Ohh no! Teacher, Daichi is...
Naota: Yes, it was the start of our seaside school with plenty of trouble ahead.
Mamimi: At that moment, space and time got twisted, and Naota and the others went into a time slip. They came upon the civil war period, right into the middle of a battle... what is history trying to make us do?
Haruko: Hey, hey, we're getting into some messy situation here. What's going to happen next?
Amarao: Somehow Naota and the others returned to the current time.
Haruko: Huh? What happened here?
Amarao: Huh?
Haruko: I mean, like how did they return... what they did during the civil war and all that...
Amarao: Hmm...that's a bit difficult.

(Audience laughter)

Haruko: What is that? You sound like some government official, Amarao. Oh well...ok...continue.
Amarao: All right. Naota and the others' seaside school continues...and this is where I want to touch on the subject of Genji Yasui, who runs the boarding house.

(Audience laughter)

Haruko: Huh? Who is that? Kamon, could you somehow wrap all this up?
Kamon: Uhh... Thus Naota became an adult. What remained behind were only the waves crashing on the beach...

(Audience laughter)

Haruko: Is that the end!?

(Audience laughter)

Haruko:
So...Naota becomes an adult, huh? Umm...so he goes to sea, falls into a time slip, returns to sea and becomes an adult...Well...I guess if you say it all wrapped up neatly, I guess it did.

Haruko: Ok. The next topic; Every time something weird comes out of Takkun's head. And today, I want you all to tell us what you wouldn't want to see coming out of his head.
Mamimi: Yes!
Haruko: Yes~! Sameji
Mamimi: A ready wit.
Haruko: Ohh...now that would be bad.

(Audience laughter)

Haruko: A ready wit would be bad...you know, just like Ikky-san. I mean, it would be bad if he solved a hard question with a ready wit every time.
Naota: Shogun. Ok, to start with, please let a tiger appear from the folding screen.
Haruko: Hey! Just like that, huh? That's bad. Oh, I forgot. Miyu Miyu, give Sameji a zabuton.
Miyu Miyu: Po pe po pen
Amarao: Ok. A demon... from Arabia.
Haruko: What's that?
Amarao: The drawing has a Disney flavor to it.
Haruko: Ohh...well, that surely would be a problem. Ok, take your zabuton.

(Audience laughter)

Amarao: Huh? Isn't something funny here?
Kamon: Yes.
Haruko: Yes, father? What would you not want to see coming out of Naota's head?
Kamon: Blood.
Haruko: Huh?
Kamon: Blood. A massive amount of blood.
Haruko: That would mean he's hurt, right? That he should go to a hospital. That's something that could really happen. Don't you have anything that you wouldn't want to see come out that's impossible in real life?
Kamon: Lice.
Haruko: Elementary school kids a long time ago, huh?
Kamon: A robot or something.
Haruko: Ohh...now that's already coming out.
Naota: Wheee.... Arrghh...Whoa!
Haruko: It really looks like something would come out of Takkun's head again...and it's also about time to end the Fooly Cooly version Ohgiri!
Naota: Whoa...Ahhh!

(Audience applause)

The contents of this English translated text is:

2000 King Record Co., Ltd. All Rights Reserved
© 1999 GAINAX / KGI

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